A Year Since Graduation

So today it’s officially a year since Graduating from University. A year. A Whole damn 365 days. I would like to confirm a few things;

-Post Graduation Blues is REAL

-No I do not have my life together a year later

– And finally nope that degree haven’t felt like I have required it once in this last year

Although there is a bittersweet feeling. I had such high expectations of my job this time a year ago. Still in that shit show of a job. I thought things would be great after University I was so done with my degree. Right now I question what was the damn rush?!

However, a year on. I do feel like I am finally making waves. Graduation blues still linger. For example the question of what I am actually going to do with my life is still an everyday concern. I am finally trying to get somewhere. OR ANYWHERE. Away from this job. It’s a working progress and by progress I mean I will be quitting my job no matter what at the end of November. The degree, it may not be useful right now, but jobs on my TEFL course require it. So there! Finally found an advantage.

This was more just a summary of how a year after graduation life carry’s on. I am currently very tired after thinking it was acceptable to go to a gig on a work night. On that note I’m going to bed! ✌🏽

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21 Things I have Learnt in 21 Years

So tomorrow I turn 22. Yes I probably will caption some lyrics to that Taylor Swift song on my IG I can only do it once right?! However, it got me thinking of all the things I have learnt, accepted and how I have grown in the last 21 years and even in the last year. I came up with a list of 21 things I have learnt, some are just advice others are things I plan to do in the near future;

1. You’re whole life doesn’t have to be figured out.

I finished University this time last year and am I any closer to figuring out what I want to do. Nope!

2. It’s okay to want to quit your job and be reckless sometimes

I feel like now I am in my twenties all these life decisions should be happening. When in reality all I want to do sometimes is quit the job, by the ticket and get the hell out of here! One day I will do this I promise..

3. Changing careers a million times won’t destroy your job prospects – who cares if you did 8 months in a coffee shop?!

4. Never be too afraid to do the thing you truly want to do because it isn’t the easy route or you just don’t know how to start

Advice from my mum she said she never wants me or my sister to look back with regret at the choices we make

5. Your happiness is just as important as others

6. Self love is so important to your health 

7. It’s okay to stop talking to people who no longer have a positive effect on your life.

I have learnt this more in the last 6 months. Even if someone hasn’t done anything intentionally cruel, the way they act and their attitude towards you can actually be hurtful without you realising for a long time. I learnt that the hard way…

8. Feeling like you are ready to fly the nest doesn’t make you a bad persons (You may have seen my other blog post When It’s Time To Fly The Nest )

9. Counting calories doesn’t have to be an everyday thing drink the wine, eat the pizza and know that no matter what you weigh you will still have an AMAZING holiday!

10. Planning your life won’t make it any easier! The script will always change

11. Live in the now it’s all we have

12. It’s okay for some chapters to end without anything said at all. Whether this be with parents, friends or loved ones. Sometimes it does just end.

13. Don’t regret anything that makes you who you are.

14. Forgive yourself you’re only human

15. It’s okay to not have a close friends right now maybe it just takes times

16. Apply for the damn TEFL course get out of this job and move country!

17. Never not do anything out of fear or past failures

18. Not every change is a failure and it doesn’t have to define us

19. Be who you are, not who the world expects you to be

20. Someday you will look back on your journey and know the moments you were low or the job you hated were all just learning curves in life!

21. In a year from now I hope things are different I hope I have got out of this job, applied and completed the TEFL course. Be in some new part of the world. And most of all be happy with the choices I’ve made and the life I am living!

I urge everyone to write a list! It actually has made me feel more motivated than ever. I hope everyone has a good day I’ll be drinking wine in the sun, celebrating being another year older. Also watching England in the World Cup it has to be played on my birthday doesn’t it!

When You Learn To Let Go

Life as a uni student was hard especially my second year. I had some issues. I read a book recently (another one) I’m just full of wisdom lately. It said you need to let go of the past and accept it for what it was. And it’s true I don’t think I had for a long time I had let it burden my present whenever I spoke about it. I also read this quote that was very apt…

So now I’m back at this university visiting friends as they finish their finals year. You may have seen my previous post about going back to my old uni Start living in the present it felt different then. This time it feels different

I’m not letting the girl walk all over me. I stand with conviction and have told them about the dreams I’m pursuing with strength. Admittedly I am currently awake sitting on their sofa at 8am. This is because 1. I get up early to go to work everyday how’s a girl meant to change that pattern and 2. It is for once really hot in England so I have to embrace this weather! I just feel different about everything it’s like yes that was a part of my life and this is the right now, but the past isn’t hurting me anymore. I’m also not letting the people. The Kesha song has popped in my head! But it’s true I have learned to let it go…

Abandoning My Blog and Reuniting With Old Friends

So 9-5 I’ve been at it a good 5 weeks in that time I’ve graduated. Woo! But I’ve discovered some things;

1. I do not want to work 9-5 for the rest of my life. One morning I googled Dolly Parsons 9-5 song in the madness and have never realised the lyrics are so true…

“Barely gettin’ by, it’s all takin’ and no givin” – you can tell that to my bank account

“They let you dream just to watch ’em shatter. You’re just a step on the boss-man’s ladder” – basically you are pretty much a nobody

Okay I’ll stop with the lyrics now but it’s so true.

2. I thought my plans of travelling would change turns out it’s gave me more of a desire to do it

I’m 21 not old! If this is what I’ve signed up for, for the rest of my life it’s a no from me! I even said to my mum if I’m still here in two years literally write my letter of resignation.

So they were just some of the things I learnt in this 9-5 life. I recently also reunited with an old friend. She had messaged me when the earthquake hit in kos and although I said I’d message her when I’m back by the time I had finally got my life together it was October.

I thought take the risk she can only ignore me or just say no? So I did it. I don’t know why I was ever so afraid most of the time people are in the exact same position as you. We just never realise it. It turned out we had such an amazing night we agreed to keep in contact more regularly and to this day we still have. Our friendship is 7 years old but we haven’t seen each other in 2 and half years in between the chatting and of course the drinking it was amazing how much we had shared in common including tough times. 

I would recommend everyone who thinks about a friend or someone they haven’t spoken to in a while just message them! A lot of the time they are probably building up the courage to message you!

Anyway as I’ve turned into an old lady who literally parties at the weekend and goes to bed early in the week I will say goodnight!

Giving Ourselves More Credit

So I went for 4 job interviews this week. 4. Yes 4. I went for one and thought yeah it’s alright. The next day I found out I have another one. LOVED IT. Then went for a second interview at both of them. Today in my sisters and my mums group chat and I quote I said: “I will cry if I don’t get this job”. LITERALLY.

I think we all have that outlook sometimes that things won’t go our way. Things won’t go as planned. I know I’m one to always think the worse. I also thought if I think badly about the job maybe good will come. I know my psychology is messed uppppp.

So I got the call from the agency saying they are going to call the company. It was 4:50pm I thought if I stare at this phone any more I’m going to go mad. Then my sister say I’ve got a call. I answer it. I got the damn job!

It got me thinking we always think the worse, but still hope for the best. I literally always do. For once the outcome was in my favour and I’m literally on cloud 9. Yes at the age of 21 I jumped up and down for joy. Then opened the bottle of prosecco and am now sitting here drinking alone (Because who doesn’t like a Bridget Jones interpretation). No one else wanted to drink on a Thursday night can’t think why?!!

Anyway it just got me thinking we think the worse and give ourselves less credit than we deserve! On that note I need to go pack to spend my last weekend pretending I’m a Uni student before acting like a serious adult starting my job on Monday.

Have a good weekend! xxx

Life in Limbo

They tell you to go to school and gain an education, they recommend further education so that you can go to university. Then at 18 the options are to get a job in who knows what or go to University. So you spend another three years doing a course purely because you did well at it with no idea what you’re going to do with it.

Fast forward to being 21 graduating with a First. What happens now?

For a long time I’ve thought I would figure out what I want to do with my life in a few years. At 16 I thought I would know after my A-Levels. After my A-Levels I was sure I would know what I wanted to do after University. After three years and a ton of education later do I know what I want to do haven’t got a fucking clue.

Being a 20 something today there is so much pressure; to get the right grades and then to get the right job. I didn’t apply for Graduate roles. One because I didn’t know what I wanted to do and Two because I didn’t want to put the pressure on myself to compete with the snobby people I would imagine going for the same roles as me. I know its bad haha but I just thought if I kept doing me I would figure it out eventually.

After spending my summer abroad and now it’s September. I’ll say it again SEPTEMBER I haven’t got a clue what I want to do. I’m currently applying for jobs in business (I did my degree in this) I know who on earth does that?!

I’m not applying for these jobs because I envision a career in business in a 9-5 office making money no wayyyy! I’m doing it so that I can raise enough money so that I can get out of this town, get out of this country and go see the world. And then when I’m closer to 30 maybe maybe never I’ll have it together. Because right now I most certainly don’t want to sit in an office and live to work then die. If that’s what I did all this Education for then I don’t know why I bothered.

My sister and I are already trying to plan our next trip in November. Admittedly neither of us have jobs, she graduates tomorrow and I graduate next month. But still it’s crazy how all this Education has made me want to run for the hills not actually use the knowledge I gained to get a good job which would be the appropriate use for them.

Anyway this is my post-grad rant after applying to several jobs. I’m waiting for the family members to ask “so what are you going to do now you’ve finished university and travelling?” if anyone has any appropriate responses and by appropriate I mean inappropriate feel free to comment!


 

Turning The Page 

Hey, it’s been a while!

Recently I’ve met up with people from Uni who I don’t speak to that often and have treated me like rubbish in the past. People may ask why I bothered even giving them the time of day. I like to think im a forgiving person and someone that can rise above. This may be viewed as weak, but it is who I am. So although I was apprehensive I met up with them anyway.
I would like to think this last year has changed me. I’ve learnt to stand on my own two feet and if I’m not happy having the courage to make changes.

So I met up with one friend which ended up a disaster, but I kind of treated it as closure. I have finally accepted that I have gave them a chance and they were no different.

Last weekend I also met up with another friend. My mum doesn’t approve of this person because she treats me like crap. All I could think of was the Justin Bieber song ‘Love Yourself’ haha. So I waited a year before seeing her then she ended up also treating me like crap. After I drove all that way. Although she did apologise it was a backhanded apology. 

I’ve finally got my closure. I’m not gonna worry about what they think of me and how they feel because let’s be honest they don’t care. Some people would have dropped these people along time ago. It may have taken me a bit longer, but I think it’s a lesson learned and it’s time to move on. 


Now I’m on to bigger and better things although it may have taken me a long time to realise having very few friends is better than having friends who treat you worse than strangers. 

Hope everyone has a good day!