After university I thought adult life would just be different you know? I would be in a job I’m happy in (not true), be full of positivity (not true), perhaps cut down on the alcohol (also not true).
I hate my job – I’m currently saving to do the TEFL course which is the only reason I haven’t packed up and quit already. The whole concept of 9 to 5 is literally awful. The people aren’t even nice. I even said today is this it? Is this all there is to life?
So I went to Dublin this weekend and literally did not stop drinking – no dry January here. However, I did decided after my weekend full of drinking that I need to make changes. It’s so hard when you fall into habits. Going out every weekend and drinking on a work night are two habits that for sure need to be stopped. It will also help me to get out of my job quicker.
So I’ve decided to give up alcohol until in the end of February… yeah the fact that I think I will fail doesn’t surprise me. This time I’m determined. I’ve been eating a lot healthier I just ruin it with drinking. Note to self perhaps make New Year’s resolutions at the start of January rather than have an epiphany at the end of January.
I am aware this post has been complaining, and there are people with a lot less. The sinner also says there are people with a lot more haha.
So now that I work 9-5 in a job I hate, to come home and eat healthy and then not drink alcohol on the weekend. WHAT WILL I DO WITH MY LIFE?! I guess I’ve got to try…
Today I went back to the place I was born. This is the first time I’ve visited there since I was two years old when we left to live in a new town. You know that Miranda Lambert song “The house that built me” we were literally in the car outside the house I lived in for the first two years of my life. Creepy I KNOW RIGHT.
It was weird, my mum had recently visited their and had asked us if we would like to go back. So after 19 years we thought why the hell not?!
It was odd.. we walked through the town and we went to the world’s best pub in Suffolk. It got me thinking. The life we could have had there. It is definitely more country life than where we live now, the house is different to where we live, the location is more rural and there is a lot of trees. It was everything I would have wanted. But would we have been happy?
I think about my life now. The town I live in, the people I know and the people I used to know. As well as the School and University I went to. Would it have been different, would things that went wrong/right have been different? I guess I will never know.
I get the song now. “They say you can’t go home again”. Life fell the way it did for a reason. Do I wish some things were different?? Of course, but I know I can change them especially this next year.
This last year has been amazing and looking back hasn’t made me regret one thing.
Fun fact – I can now complete a Rubik’s cube in 3 minutes and 31 seconds what did you do this Christmas break? Haha
So I had a blog post ready about complaining about my problems and how I should be more grateful and that I’m going through a bad patch. I decided to scrap that.
I know I’m not where I want to be, but I know where I will be. This is literally just a stop along the way. But in hindsight this year has been amazing. And although I feel a little low now. It’s okay because I’m reflection I’ve had an amazing year. I promised myself this year would be good. And it’s has surpassed my expectations. Next year I plan to top that and not think oh it will be okay compared to last year because isn’t that what life’s about?! Not settling for less than we deserve.
So I finally started reading again during lunch at my crap job. I’ve started reading; “This is going to hurt’ by Adam. For any greys anatomy fans this is basically the British version based on the NHS. But it’s a true story about one mans life as a junior doctor. Although some of the stuff is dreadful the guy is so witty and funny you can’t help, but laugh at his experience.
It’s makes me feel more positive about life and ready to take on the day because at the end of the day I will be okay I’ve been through worse.
In hindsight this year has been incredible this is just a blip.
Also little update the south of England finally got snow! It’s a Christmas miracle.
So I was sitting with my sister and she said I feel like you just need to admit you hate it. There’s nothing to be ashamed of. I tried to justify it, I tried to convince her (and myself) that noooo it’s not so bad. But the truth I hate it. 9-5 is not for me. I would rather be dead that do this for the next 30 years. I read this post the other day; to the girl who lost her ambition to travel. People asked what you wanted to do in 5 years time she stated she wanted to be in this country or that country. They replied no as a job?
I’ve never related to anything so much haha. I go to work I come home I get drunk on the weekends and then repeat the same action as I have for the last 8 weeks. And I know my whole life isn’t revolved around a job, but when you work 9-5 5 days a week. Let’s get real here it kind of is!
My sister has finally figured out what she wants to do. Me on the other hand I still want to see the world and then figure it out. I’m 21 not 50. I think I definitely have post-graduate blues. Don’t get me wrong I hated university, but when people asked you what you wanted to do it was okay not to know because when your a student your still a child. Now that I have a full time job, with a degree that answer doesn’t quite have the same ring to it.
Anyway here’s to figuring out my next step in traveling whilst trying not to quit my job every single day!
So 9-5 I’ve been at it a good 5 weeks in that time I’ve graduated. Woo! But I’ve discovered some things;
1. I do not want to work 9-5 for the rest of my life. One morning I googled Dolly Parsons 9-5 song in the madness and have never realised the lyrics are so true…
“Barely gettin’ by, it’s all takin’ and no givin” – you can tell that to my bank account
“They let you dream just to watch ’em shatter. You’re just a step on the boss-man’s ladder” – basically you are pretty much a nobody
Okay I’ll stop with the lyrics now but it’s so true.
2. I thought my plans of travelling would change turns out it’s gave me more of a desire to do it
I’m 21 not old! If this is what I’ve signed up for, for the rest of my life it’s a no from me! I even said to my mum if I’m still here in two years literally write my letter of resignation.
So they were just some of the things I learnt in this 9-5 life. I recently also reunited with an old friend. She had messaged me when the earthquake hit in kos and although I said I’d message her when I’m back by the time I had finally got my life together it was October.
I thought take the risk she can only ignore me or just say no? So I did it. I don’t know why I was ever so afraid most of the time people are in the exact same position as you. We just never realise it. It turned out we had such an amazing night we agreed to keep in contact more regularly and to this day we still have. Our friendship is 7 years old but we haven’t seen each other in 2 and half years in between the chatting and of course the drinking it was amazing how much we had shared in common including tough times.
I would recommend everyone who thinks about a friend or someone they haven’t spoken to in a while just message them! A lot of the time they are probably building up the courage to message you!
Anyway as I’ve turned into an old lady who literally parties at the weekend and goes to bed early in the week I will say goodnight!
Since coming back from travelling I’ve had to get my diet back on track which is slightly depressing… I guess holidays can’t last forever. So I’ve come up with a plan so that I’m not stuck in this town forever. However, some things will never change like exercising and trying to lose weight, but with all the drinking and partying this summer I just didn’t have much time for that you know haha!
In Italy traditional pizza and pasta don’t actually use meat aside from ham in their dishes. So for the whole week we were all like where is the damn chicken. Okay we did eat McDonald’s once and caved haha. But it got me thinking about meat yes it contains protein, but so do many other products. My mum who is another diet advocate (unfortunately we all are in this house) has started meat free days. Where two days a week she doesn’t eat meat.
I’m someone that likes to google the benefits before I get involved in something. Typical haha. But I was actually quite surprised…
1. Reducing the risk of heart attacks and strokes
2. Help to prevent cancer
3. Helps with weight loss in general
It can also reduce the impact of climate change.
So I’m not saying I’ll be a full-blown veggie, but today I decided to include meat free Monday’s into my diet which is the new craze and tbh it’s not actually that bad!
I also went for my first run in a long time on Saturday. It reminded me why I liked it so much. I also tried hummus at the weekend – yeah that shits still gross not a fan. And I have also given up alcohol for a while – this summer got to out of control haha.
To finish off my summer I spent a week in Italy. Eating as much spaghetti and pizza as I can handle!
We started off in Rome visiting some amazing sights including St Peters Square, the Colosseum and for any Lizzie McGuire movie fans I also made a wish in the beautiful Trevi fountain.
We also went on a bar crawl around Rome with so many nationalities. To say that was a crazy night would be an understatement.
After 4 days we took the train to Naples…
Well let’s just say Naples isn’t quite like Rome. We were staying in the unsafe area and for what it’s worth I wouldn’t recommend being outside at night. Still to get over our initial shock we made plans…
The next day we took the ferry to Capri. Okay if I was rich Capri would be my holiday destination for a lifetime it was so beautiful and the water was so clear. We actually had an amazing day sitting on the beach with all the locals.
On our final full day we took the train which we stood on for an hour with no air-con (tragic) to Pompeii. As one of the worlds heritage sites it was amazing and so sad to imagine a city wiped out after being buried under a mountain of volcano ash from the eruption of Mount Vesuvius. We actually saw a preserved child, dog and adult which is just so sad and one of the most memorable parts of my trip to Naples.
Also fun fact Bastilles song Pompeii actually was about Pompeii I googled it just to double check then we listened to it. Such a throwback tune!
My trip to Italy was incredible despite some bits being a bit hazy from all the wine we drunk. Once again I met some amazing people and visited an amazing country. My drive to keep travelling has only been fueled even more….