I Hate My Job

So I was sitting with my sister and she said I feel like you just need to admit you hate it. There’s nothing to be ashamed of. I tried to justify it, I tried to convince her (and myself) that noooo it’s not so bad. But the truth I hate it. 9-5 is not for me. I would rather be dead that do this for the next 30 years. I read this post the other day; to the girl who lost her ambition to travel. People asked what you wanted to do in 5 years time she stated she wanted to be in this country or that country. They replied no as a job?

I’ve never related to anything so much haha. I go to work I come home I get drunk on the weekends and then repeat the same action as I have for the last 8 weeks. And I know my whole life isn’t revolved around a job, but when you work 9-5 5 days a week. Let’s get real here it kind of is!

My sister has finally figured out what she wants to do. Me on the other hand I still want to see the world and then figure it out. I’m 21 not 50. I think I definitely have post-graduate blues. Don’t get me wrong I hated university, but when people asked you what you wanted to do it was okay not to know because when your a student your still a child. Now that I have a full time job, with a degree that answer doesn’t quite have the same ring to it.

Anyway here’s to figuring out my next step in traveling whilst trying not to quit my job every single day!

I don’t really have a purpose for this photo except for I took it haha.

This is basically a photo of my life haha I joke!


Turning The Page 

Hey, it’s been a while!

Recently I’ve met up with people from Uni who I don’t speak to that often and have treated me like rubbish in the past. People may ask why I bothered even giving them the time of day. I like to think im a forgiving person and someone that can rise above. This may be viewed as weak, but it is who I am. So although I was apprehensive I met up with them anyway.
I would like to think this last year has changed me. I’ve learnt to stand on my own two feet and if I’m not happy having the courage to make changes.

So I met up with one friend which ended up a disaster, but I kind of treated it as closure. I have finally accepted that I have gave them a chance and they were no different.

Last weekend I also met up with another friend. My mum doesn’t approve of this person because she treats me like crap. All I could think of was the Justin Bieber song ‘Love Yourself’ haha. So I waited a year before seeing her then she ended up also treating me like crap. After I drove all that way. Although she did apologise it was a backhanded apology. 

I’ve finally got my closure. I’m not gonna worry about what they think of me and how they feel because let’s be honest they don’t care. Some people would have dropped these people along time ago. It may have taken me a bit longer, but I think it’s a lesson learned and it’s time to move on. 

Now I’m on to bigger and better things although it may have taken me a long time to realise having very few friends is better than having friends who treat you worse than strangers. 

Hope everyone has a good day! 

Flicking The Switch

This week I’ve found a new sense of positivity. In life, in my education and in fitness. It’s almost like I’ve flicked the switch. I get so worried about the future that I forget to live in the present. We are all desperate for more, but what if this is it. You are in control of your own life if this is it then you have to go and fight for better. Rather than complain, I know no one else is gonna change my life for me so I better start.

This week I’m back to healthy eating I finally wore my new trainers to the gym (it’s the little things) and have started eating better. Along with drinking my green tea (strong advocate go try!) Small changes will eventually amount to big  differences with time and patience. I figure if I spend all my time complaining why not spend my time changing ? 

Anyone else started to change this week? 

Today’s quote of the day;

I feel like I’ve moved on from this and ready to handle what life throws at me!

Stop Worrying And Start Living

I have always lived my life worrying, worrying what will happen if I do/don’t do something, worrying if I made different choices I wouldn’t be in the position I am. Worrying about worrying.

Until recently when I had a major breakdown I realised I couldn’t even be happy about the prospect of a job because in my eyes the likely hood of actually getting it won’t pay off. It’s crazy to think this your whole life can be lived with fear and every action you take is calculated to ensure something may/may not happen.

I realised even if you predetermine every step and every choice you make nothing’s going to go to plan because when does life ever? But it’s not necessarily a bad thing. I’m not a religious person, but I like to think God has a plan and I’m exactly where I should be right now.

So I vow to stop worrying about things that could happen and just go with it. Just enjoy life, I spend so much worrying that it’s time to start living.

Today’s quote of the day;

So I decided to change-up my blog rather than have one positive. Life should just be a positive and one thing I loveeeee is music, discovering new artists and just everything about music in general so I decided to choose my fav song lyrics on this particular day instead.
Today’s lyrics of the day;

“I’m a comeback kid. Don’t know why bad things happened, but they did. I don’t think I deserve the hurt I get, but I’m made for it. It’s not the end” ~ The Band Perry – Comeback Kid

To My Miserable Self

So it’s been a while… I would like to think I’m a positive person who looks at set backs and challenges and embraces them as much as possible. God knows I’ve had enough of them! But sometimes there isn’t a positive and sometimes like recently I can’t see a happy future insight.

Yesterday I broke down a cried in the middle of the town centre (not the best place) I told my mum how unhappy I was. She knows I’ve been miserable part of me thinks I accept it more than she does. I told her I just have nothing which I still believe 24 hours on is true. And yes I have my health blah blah blah. But other than that I just feel exhausted in unhappiness. My mum is someone who is always positive she believes theirs a meaning behind everything she said in the middle of my breakdown you have so much going for you. I just don’t see it.

I’ve been struggling to look for a job, struggling to find trustworthy friends, struggling to lose weight. I just feel like I have the weight of the world on top of me and finally I’ve cracked. I’m not sure there is a solution or a way out right now.

I don’t want to be a negative person and like my other posts have said there is always positive in every day, but sometimes their isn’t a positive there is just no point?

Right now all I can do is be miserable and hope that sometime soon things change. I know this is the worst possible advice for myself and others, but it’s all I’ve got right now. Any one feel to share their wisdom with me feel free but, proceed with caution… I joke haha

From The Bad To The Good

Last week I felt so negative about where I was at in my life, partly because I was doing the same thing every single day and although I was looking for a job i didn’t have much hope in finding one. I thought great is this it, is this the feeling I am going to have for the next 3 months? I discovered in that moment that the future doesn’t hold anyone’s happiness it’s about right now.  So this post is for me and anyone else to read when life isn’t going  the way we hope think about the good moments that have already occurred. For me it occurred straight after that moment which I’m not sure if it was luck or just fate.

So after feeling negative and finally admitting to myself how I had been feeling all these things occurred straight after;

I received  a phone call offering me an interview for work finally!  I then went to my Dad’s house that night to celebrate my birthday and found out he bought me a car. To say I was shocked was an understatement. I then drove my car home which is about 25 minutes away after not driving since I past my test 2 years ago. To say I was shitting it was an understatement haha can you imagine. I can confirm I did survive and did not crash.

Now this week I feel I can take on new heights, do new things, be whatever i want. I know people always say it, but I genuinely wish i could bottle up this feeling so that my future self no matter how bad things are there is always hope. I know I’m not a confident person and dread the thought of being out of my comfort zone.

However, this week I feel like a completely different person after the good things that have happened to me. I feel more determined than ever in life and I just know that what ever happens in life good or bad I’ll survive.

Today’s quote of the day;


Today’s positive of the day;

Hopeful finding a summer job soon and finally getting off my bum and doing something!

Just live…

I feel like I spend my whole life waiting. Waiting for time to move quicker, waiting for the tough times to end, waiting for the weekend. Yet what we all seem to forget is, there is a plan much bigger than you and I and waiting for the tough times to end isn’t living. I currently have two weeks until my life stops moving from one end of the country to the other going from the South East to the South West and staying where I belong which is home. However, although I have been through a tough experience in my life. It’s made me stronger without even realising it because there is  a plan much bigger than me and this was just a moment in time. Rather than waiting for it to end I need to embrace it. Life is so short and although there are moments that are tough waiting for them to pass isn’t going to make them hurry along quicker so instead I’ve learned to embrace life let go of what I can’t change and stay positive even through the tough times.

Today’s quote of the day;

Photo credit – Instagram ~ Priyaquotes

Today’s positive of the day;
I need to remember that things will get better no matter how bad life is right now.